maddeningly mercurial
quirky history
loads of muscle
packed as tight as a bookshelf
as entertaining to watch as a series of good movie sequels
a splendid* mosaic of speed and power
simply can't put the remainder of the assembly together
dazzling
The only question the Tigers have is a happy one
a left-hand Brian Moehler
an artillery piece for an arm
ranks as at least basic insurance
one-time stardust prospect
Another potential high-jumper
Monday, November 30, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
Confusion
I'm confused.
Terry Foster's confused.
Terry Foster / Sunday, October 10th, 2009
Iowa City, Iowa -- Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez tried his best to paint a rosy picture after Saturday's 30-28 loss to Iowa. If you listened to Rodriguez address the media, all is well in the land of maize and blue. But it is not.
Folks, all is not well.
There is something wrong with this brew.
What's wrong with it?
What's going on with Michigan's program?
I am not sure.
But something does not smell right.
Ah, the brew smells. Gotcha.
We get it Terry. Lay off the brew already.
Terry Foster / Monday, October 12th, 2009
U-M in good shape despite setbacks
Sunday must have been a kickass day for the Michigan brewmaster.
Terry Foster's confused.
Terry Foster / Sunday, October 10th, 2009
Iowa City, Iowa -- Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez tried his best to paint a rosy picture after Saturday's 30-28 loss to Iowa. If you listened to Rodriguez address the media, all is well in the land of maize and blue. But it is not.
Folks, all is not well.
There is something wrong with this brew.
What's wrong with it?
What's going on with Michigan's program?
I am not sure.
But something does not smell right.
Ah, the brew smells. Gotcha.
We get it Terry. Lay off the brew already.
Terry Foster / Monday, October 12th, 2009
U-M in good shape despite setbacks
Sunday must have been a kickass day for the Michigan brewmaster.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Quick Question...
Those of you enjoying the thrilling Lions/Steelers tilt:
Has Dick Enberg been able to correctly identify a Lions receiver yet today? Seriously. Dennis Northcutt is Bryant Johnson. Calvin Johnson is Bryant Johnson. Bryant Johnson is Derrick Williams. Charles Rogers is Mike Williams. (OK, that one didn't happen but still)
At running back, Maurice Morris is Kevin Smith.
A man named Josh McDaniel is coaching the Broncos.
Last night, Musberger thought Travis Minor was playing for Michigan.
Is it too much to ask for the announcers to either:
a. not be senile
b. know who the players are in the game
c. have good enough vision to see the field
d. not be complete assclowns
Is it?
Has Dick Enberg been able to correctly identify a Lions receiver yet today? Seriously. Dennis Northcutt is Bryant Johnson. Calvin Johnson is Bryant Johnson. Bryant Johnson is Derrick Williams. Charles Rogers is Mike Williams. (OK, that one didn't happen but still)
At running back, Maurice Morris is Kevin Smith.
A man named Josh McDaniel is coaching the Broncos.
Last night, Musberger thought Travis Minor was playing for Michigan.
Is it too much to ask for the announcers to either:
a. not be senile
b. know who the players are in the game
c. have good enough vision to see the field
d. not be complete assclowns
Is it?
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I Wonder...
if people like Lynn realize the same people that "bat" for baseball teams typically also "field" for those teams.
An otherwise solidly built baseball team has too few hitters.
It's true, the Tigers only have 7 hitters on their roster. They're the modern day version of Bugs Bunny.
But seriously, the Tigers offense was awful this year. They finished 10th in the AL in runs scored and in reality were 11th since they needed an extra game to pass the Orioles.
On the other hand, the Tigers run prevention was pretty good, 4th best in the league prior to game 163.
Last offseason, Dave Dombrowski and the rest of the Blue Shirt Crew™ decided that one of the easiest ways to improve the club would be to improve the team defense. They were very successful in doing that, as the Tigers jumped from 24th in defensive efficiency in 2008 to 9th overall in 2009.
The Tigers made that leap by signing shortstop Adam Everett, trading for catcher Gerald Laird, moving Brandon Inge back to third base, and installing Carlos Guillen in left field. They were also counting on improvement from Miguel Cabrera at first base where he landed after tumbling down the defensive spectrum.
Other than Guillen continuing his run of fragility, basically all of those moves worked. On defense.
In Lynn-speak: They have infield defense on a celestial level, as they do at catcher. But they don't have the bats.
What Lynn fails to realize is that those "celestial" (a great new adjective for Señor Thesaurus) infielders aren't allowed to play all-time defense. In fact, those same guys have to hit.
Career batting line for Adam Everett:
.245/.297/.351
Career batting line for Gerald Laird:
.247/.306/.367
Career batting line for Brandon Inge:
.236/.305/.394
That's 3/5ths of the infield star system.
That's a third of your regular batting order.
That's going to make it hard to score runs unless your other 6 guys are pretty damn awesometastic.
Meanwhile, just for fun, let's look at how those 3 celestial baseball guys "hit" in 2009:
Everett:
.238/.288/.325
Laird:
.225/.306/.320
Inge:
.230/.314/.406
Who could have seen it coming!?
Lynn continues with some other weird comments and craziness but I'm too tired to chronicle it all.
Of note, Lynn is back on the Casper Wells train which is always fun.
Captain Blue Shirt's presser today deserves a post of its own so I'll try to get to that later or tomorrow.
Until later loyal reader.
I mean readers.
Readers.
An otherwise solidly built baseball team has too few hitters.
It's true, the Tigers only have 7 hitters on their roster. They're the modern day version of Bugs Bunny.
But seriously, the Tigers offense was awful this year. They finished 10th in the AL in runs scored and in reality were 11th since they needed an extra game to pass the Orioles.
On the other hand, the Tigers run prevention was pretty good, 4th best in the league prior to game 163.
Last offseason, Dave Dombrowski and the rest of the Blue Shirt Crew™ decided that one of the easiest ways to improve the club would be to improve the team defense. They were very successful in doing that, as the Tigers jumped from 24th in defensive efficiency in 2008 to 9th overall in 2009.
The Tigers made that leap by signing shortstop Adam Everett, trading for catcher Gerald Laird, moving Brandon Inge back to third base, and installing Carlos Guillen in left field. They were also counting on improvement from Miguel Cabrera at first base where he landed after tumbling down the defensive spectrum.
Other than Guillen continuing his run of fragility, basically all of those moves worked. On defense.
In Lynn-speak: They have infield defense on a celestial level, as they do at catcher. But they don't have the bats.
What Lynn fails to realize is that those "celestial" (a great new adjective for Señor Thesaurus) infielders aren't allowed to play all-time defense. In fact, those same guys have to hit.
Career batting line for Adam Everett:
.245/.297/.351
Career batting line for Gerald Laird:
.247/.306/.367
Career batting line for Brandon Inge:
.236/.305/.394
That's 3/5ths of the infield star system.
That's a third of your regular batting order.
That's going to make it hard to score runs unless your other 6 guys are pretty damn awesometastic.
Meanwhile, just for fun, let's look at how those 3 celestial baseball guys "hit" in 2009:
Everett:
.238/.288/.325
Laird:
.225/.306/.320
Inge:
.230/.314/.406
Who could have seen it coming!?
Lynn continues with some other weird comments and craziness but I'm too tired to chronicle it all.
Of note, Lynn is back on the Casper Wells train which is always fun.
Captain Blue Shirt's presser today deserves a post of its own so I'll try to get to that later or tomorrow.
Until later loyal reader.
I mean readers.
Readers.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Yahtzee!
Lynn has been pretty down on the ol' Tigs lately. That being said, Lynn is still an unstoppable killing machine with a thesaurus fetish:
Washburn had to leave after one inning Tuesday in the Tigers' 11-1 loss to the Kansas City Royals at Comerica Park. The problem was recurring "soreness" that has gnawed at Washburn's left knee throughout the season, even as he was rolling up splendid numbers with the Seattle Mariners before they traded him to the Tigers on July 31.
Can anyone tell me why soreness is in quotes? In the immortal words of the Mayor of Tigertown, is that a dig?
Washburn had to leave after one inning Tuesday in the Tigers' 11-1 loss to the Kansas City Royals at Comerica Park. The problem was recurring "soreness" that has gnawed at Washburn's left knee throughout the season, even as he was rolling up splendid numbers with the Seattle Mariners before they traded him to the Tigers on July 31.
Can anyone tell me why soreness is in quotes? In the immortal words of the Mayor of Tigertown, is that a dig?
My Heart Leaps Like Gazelle
FJM reunion today at Deadspin.com
As we all know by now, "scrappy" is a meaningless, arbitrary, clichéd adjective that sportswriters use to describe baseball players they like. Often, these players are small, white, terrible at baseball, David Eckstein, or all four of the above.
As we all know by now, "scrappy" is a meaningless, arbitrary, clichéd adjective that sportswriters use to describe baseball players they like. Often, these players are small, white, terrible at baseball, David Eckstein, or all four of the above.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Jaw Meet Floor
So, what has happened to a 28-year-old center fielder of such grandeur (he might as well have been called Curtis Grandeurson) that he was viewed coming into this season as the indispensable Tigers player?
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Drew Sharp Steps Up The Crazy
Noted optimist Drew Sharp turned in quite a doozy over at the Free Press the other day. There's lots of general negativity and it's basically another stock Sharp column until he gets to the subject of Curtis Granderson...
That's especially true of Curtis Granderson. How is it that an All-Star can disappoint? Granderson gets a free pass in this town because he satisfies the idealism of what a professional athlete should be: humble, polite and erudite. But he has regressed from the standard established two years ago when he became the first ballplayer since Willie Mays to accrue 20 homers, 20 doubles, 20 triples and 20 steals in a season.
Drew is correct to say that Granderson has regressed from his spectacular 2007. However, Granderson had a career year in 2007 and if not for his typical poor performance against lefties, he would have been a legitimate MVP candidate. In '07 Grandy hit .302/.361/.552 overall but an Everett-like .160/.225/.269 against southpaws. 19% of his at-bats came against fellow lefties.
In '09, Granderson is at .257/.341/.464 overall and an Infantiago-like .188/.276/.277 against port-siders. For some reason (Jim Leyland), 31% of his at-bats have come against lefthanders. Against righties, Granderson is currently hitting .288/.370/.548 which is almost identical to his 2008 line against righthanders and better than his overall 2007 performance.
In short, Grandy had his career year in '07, performed better than he ever has against lefties in '08, and should be strictly platooned from here on out. At the very least, The Skipper could do what he did last year and bat Granderson down in the order, but it's tough to do that when your catcher, shortstop, and other outfielders are auditioning to be honorary members of the 2003 Tigers.
Drew came to a similar conclusion:
He's a No. 3 or No. 5 hitter. The only reason he remains at leadoff is because there's no suitable replacement.
Oh, right, nevermind.
The guy is hitting worse overall, and specifically for fewer extra base hits, so we should put him in a spot in the order that requires more extra base hits. Perfect. Other than the fact that The Skipper seems to agree that the 3 hole is reserved for the worst hitters on the team, this IS NOT a good plan. It's also incredibly contradictory and doesn't even satisfy rudimentary levels of logical reasoning.
He was one of the AL's premier run scorers the past two seasons: 122 runs in 2007 and 112 last year despite missing much of the season's first month with a broken hand. Granderson isn't even close to matching that pace, and it has as much to do with his lack of doubles and triples as the Tigers' inability to drive in runs.
Rhetorical questions alert
Is it possible that the real reason he's scoring less runs is that he's been on base fewer times? And with regards to the doubles and triples, is it possible that the Tigers are driving in fewer runs because there are fewer runners in scoring position? And are there fewer runners in scoring position because fewer runners are getting on base?
Orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, as Drew seems to suggest, is Granderson scoring fewer runs this year simply because he's hitting fewer doubles and triples and the Tigers are being selfish meany heads and not driving him in enough.
Drew leaves us with a solution to the Tigers' woes:
A successful week against the Mariners and White Sox should inspire the Tigers to make the one necessary trade: acquiring Dodgers outfielder Juan Pierre.
I'm dying now.
He's back on the bench because of Manny Ramirez's return. Pierre would give the Tigers a true leadoff hitter, another productive left-handed bat, speed and a reliable defensive leftfielder.
Juan Pierre: productive, reliable, leftfielder.
Gammy doesn't feel so good. I think Gammy might be dying. Yep. Yep. OK. Good-bye, Bobby. Don't call anymore. I'm dead now.
That's especially true of Curtis Granderson. How is it that an All-Star can disappoint? Granderson gets a free pass in this town because he satisfies the idealism of what a professional athlete should be: humble, polite and erudite. But he has regressed from the standard established two years ago when he became the first ballplayer since Willie Mays to accrue 20 homers, 20 doubles, 20 triples and 20 steals in a season.
Drew is correct to say that Granderson has regressed from his spectacular 2007. However, Granderson had a career year in 2007 and if not for his typical poor performance against lefties, he would have been a legitimate MVP candidate. In '07 Grandy hit .302/.361/.552 overall but an Everett-like .160/.225/.269 against southpaws. 19% of his at-bats came against fellow lefties.
In '09, Granderson is at .257/.341/.464 overall and an Infantiago-like .188/.276/.277 against port-siders. For some reason (Jim Leyland), 31% of his at-bats have come against lefthanders. Against righties, Granderson is currently hitting .288/.370/.548 which is almost identical to his 2008 line against righthanders and better than his overall 2007 performance.
In short, Grandy had his career year in '07, performed better than he ever has against lefties in '08, and should be strictly platooned from here on out. At the very least, The Skipper could do what he did last year and bat Granderson down in the order, but it's tough to do that when your catcher, shortstop, and other outfielders are auditioning to be honorary members of the 2003 Tigers.
Drew came to a similar conclusion:
He's a No. 3 or No. 5 hitter. The only reason he remains at leadoff is because there's no suitable replacement.
Oh, right, nevermind.
The guy is hitting worse overall, and specifically for fewer extra base hits, so we should put him in a spot in the order that requires more extra base hits. Perfect. Other than the fact that The Skipper seems to agree that the 3 hole is reserved for the worst hitters on the team, this IS NOT a good plan. It's also incredibly contradictory and doesn't even satisfy rudimentary levels of logical reasoning.
He was one of the AL's premier run scorers the past two seasons: 122 runs in 2007 and 112 last year despite missing much of the season's first month with a broken hand. Granderson isn't even close to matching that pace, and it has as much to do with his lack of doubles and triples as the Tigers' inability to drive in runs.
Rhetorical questions alert
Is it possible that the real reason he's scoring less runs is that he's been on base fewer times? And with regards to the doubles and triples, is it possible that the Tigers are driving in fewer runs because there are fewer runners in scoring position? And are there fewer runners in scoring position because fewer runners are getting on base?
Orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, as Drew seems to suggest, is Granderson scoring fewer runs this year simply because he's hitting fewer doubles and triples and the Tigers are being selfish meany heads and not driving him in enough.
Drew leaves us with a solution to the Tigers' woes:
A successful week against the Mariners and White Sox should inspire the Tigers to make the one necessary trade: acquiring Dodgers outfielder Juan Pierre.
I'm dying now.
He's back on the bench because of Manny Ramirez's return. Pierre would give the Tigers a true leadoff hitter, another productive left-handed bat, speed and a reliable defensive leftfielder.
Juan Pierre: productive, reliable, leftfielder.
Gammy doesn't feel so good. I think Gammy might be dying. Yep. Yep. OK. Good-bye, Bobby. Don't call anymore. I'm dead now.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Rob Parker Has Done It Again
He may get loans from Joe D but they don't come in the form of good scoops...
Doug Collins Has To Be Coming Back
Rob Parker
POSTED: Tuesday, June 30, 2009
UPDATED: 7:49 am EDT July 1, 2009
AUBURN HILLS, Mich. -- Doug Collins must be coming back. It only makes sense.
http://www.clickondetroit.com/sports/19909377/detail.html
Updated: July 1, 2009, 11:55 PM ET
Collins won't coach Pistons
By Marc Stein / ESPN.com
Television analyst Doug Collins, one of two heavy favorites to fill the Detroit Pistons' sudden coaching vacancy, has withdrawn from consideration for the job.
http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?id=4301502
Well done Rob!
Doug Collins Has To Be Coming Back
Rob Parker
POSTED: Tuesday, June 30, 2009
UPDATED: 7:49 am EDT July 1, 2009
AUBURN HILLS, Mich. -- Doug Collins must be coming back. It only makes sense.
http://www.clickondetroit.com/sports/19909377/detail.html
Updated: July 1, 2009, 11:55 PM ET
Collins won't coach Pistons
By Marc Stein / ESPN.com
Television analyst Doug Collins, one of two heavy favorites to fill the Detroit Pistons' sudden coaching vacancy, has withdrawn from consideration for the job.
http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?id=4301502
Well done Rob!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Cyberdyne Systems Model 101
Lynn is a machine. A terminator. Not a T-600, or a T-800, a T-1000, or a Terminatrix. Something far beyond. He cannot be reasoned with or bargained with. He will kill your people by the thousands to get it cheaply. Jay Bilas™
If the Detroit News had editors, they could not stop him.
Turner is viewed as having a splendid pitching delivery that could make him a durable pitcher who, barring injury, should reach the majors in reasonable time.
That was proceeded by some additional flowery goodness:
The state of flux and subsequent surprises were such that the Tigers were left with a dreamy choice between Turner and the pitcher considered the top prep left-hander, Tyler Matzek, who originally was pegged to go within the first six picks.
Dreamy.
Right back atcha buddy.
If the Detroit News had editors, they could not stop him.
Turner is viewed as having a splendid pitching delivery that could make him a durable pitcher who, barring injury, should reach the majors in reasonable time.
That was proceeded by some additional flowery goodness:
The state of flux and subsequent surprises were such that the Tigers were left with a dreamy choice between Turner and the pitcher considered the top prep left-hander, Tyler Matzek, who originally was pegged to go within the first six picks.
Dreamy.
Right back atcha buddy.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Not The Sharpest Drew...Amateur Mathematician?
The Wings outhit the Ducks, 35-18, in Game 5.
Cool, thanks Drew.
Wait, there's more?
That's nearly a 2-to-1 margin.
Shit, who knew?
Cool, thanks Drew.
Wait, there's more?
That's nearly a 2-to-1 margin.
Shit, who knew?
Saturday, April 18, 2009
One Word Regeneration From Hibernation
Consider Rodney. He had a splendid '06 (7-4, 3.52 ERA, .196 opposing batting average) but a not-so-happy 2007-08, in great part because he had tendinitis that seemed primarily to cost him command of his fastball.
Rest assured, the 2009 baseball season is upon us.
Splendid.
In addition, Lynn seems to be hinting at some sort of Kaz Tadano-esque scandal involving rookie relief pitcher Ryan Perry:
Perry is the X factor. In fact, the 22-year-old right-hander is its Triple-X factor. He has shaken up the complexion of the relievers in multiple ways.
Stay Tuned!
Rest assured, the 2009 baseball season is upon us.
Splendid.
In addition, Lynn seems to be hinting at some sort of Kaz Tadano-esque scandal involving rookie relief pitcher Ryan Perry:
Perry is the X factor. In fact, the 22-year-old right-hander is its Triple-X factor. He has shaken up the complexion of the relievers in multiple ways.
Stay Tuned!
Monday, January 26, 2009
New Left Tackle For Lions
http://www.wwtdd.com/post.phtml?pk=18091
Now we can use the #1 pick on Michael Crabtree and sign Tony Romo! Hooray!
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Great Success
Remember when the boys over at Fire Joe Morgan forced Joe into accepting sabermetrics, awarding Billy Beane the Pulitzer, and resigning from ESPN?
Not ringing a bell? It was right around the time I went on sabbatical and sailed around the world with Rachel Bilson.
Anyway, now SLH has our own success story.
Since I refuse to watch ESPN, now I never have to see or hear from that fucking douche again.
GREAT SUCCESS.
Not ringing a bell? It was right around the time I went on sabbatical and sailed around the world with Rachel Bilson.
Anyway, now SLH has our own success story.
Since I refuse to watch ESPN, now I never have to see or hear from that fucking douche again.
GREAT SUCCESS.
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