Michael Rosenberg Just Can't Quit Coach Rod

Hey, Rosenberg, you have succeeded in your quest. Rich Rod is gone. What are you going to do now? Disneyorld? No? Disney Land?? Negatory? Euro Disney??? Still no???????????

OK, I give up, what is it then Mikey?

You're going to continue trying to assassinate Coach Rod? Huh? Really? I guess so.

Why Rich Rodriguez failed at U-M

This is bound to be a fair read.

Six weeks ago, the two people who seemed most likely to coach Michigan in 2011 were Rich Rodriguez and Jim Harbaugh. It won't be either. So who is next?

Hmm, this seems more like a "who's next?" type of article rather than anything to do with Rodriguez, no?

Let's say this, up front: Michigan remains a premier job. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise. Don't let them say that if Rodriguez couldn't win in Ann Arbor and Harbaugh doesn't want to be there, Michigan has lost its luster.

Good to know. It's especially a plum job now that the they got rid of that asshole head coach who didn't not promote an atmosphere of compliance. Once the Free Press goes from 50% out of business to fully out of business it will be an even better job.

After firing Rodriguez, athletic director Dave Brandon evaded questions at Wednesday's news conference about whether he had talked with Harbaugh recently about taking the job. Brandon also said he thought Harbaugh would go to the NFL. Do the math: Brandon knows Harbaugh isn't coming to Michigan.

Simpletons. Do the math. Brandon says Harbaugh is going to the NFL. Michigan isn't the NFL. Therefore Harbaugh must not be coming to Michigan. MATH. I RULEZ THE MATH.

For a while, I had reason to believe U-M had a real shot at Harbaugh. And if Harbaugh, who turned 47 last month, wanted to be a college coach forever, I think he would have jumped at the Michigan job. But he knows if he goes to U-M now, it will take him at least two or three years to reach a level he has reached at Stanford -- and would delay any chance to go to the NFL. Scratch him off the list. It sounds like Brandon already has.

I have no idea what this means. I also don't think Michigan wants to have it's next coach last only 2-3 years whether that is because he sucks balls or wins too many mythical national titles.

I am amused by people who say Rodriguez "didn't forget to coach overnight." OK, fine. But why should his ability be defined only by his three excellent years at West Virginia and not the other seven years of his Division I career?

I am amused by people that care about Michael Rosenberg's opinion on anything other than the taste of Jim Harbaugh's dick. I'm also rarely amused. Do the math.

However, I am amused at trying to judge a man's career by removing his most successful work and then looking at the rest and saying, "meh."

But I can play this game. I think it's safe to say from his continued slobbering that Rosenberg LOVES him some Jimmy Harbaugh. Fine. I'm cool with that. But watch this:

Let's take Jim Harbaugh's best 3 seasons in Division I off his résumé and see what's left...

4 wins
8 losses
3-6 in the Pac 10

That's his whole career outside of his best 3 seasons outside of Division I. Jim Harbaugh has had 1 wonderful season, 2 decent ones, and one bad. Clearly, the man just can't coach.

I just took away Bill Belichick's best 3 seasons and it turns out he has never won a Super Bowl and lost to a clearly inferior opponent in his only Super Bowl appearance. That guy blows.

I'm not saying Rodriguez is as bad as his Michigan record -- he did have three wonderful years at West Virginia and three other decent ones. But he is responsible for his failure at Michigan. For all the complaining about the Les Miles crowd and Lloyd Carr's disgruntled players and the media and "the drama," Rodriguez failed at the most important tasks for a coach: hiring assistant coaches and recruiting.

I'll cede his point about hiring assistants. I'll assume "assistants" means "defensive coordinators" and there's little to argue other than saying since both Shafer and Robinson failed so miserably I think that the players MIGHT have had something to do with it.

With regards to recruiting, Rosenberg will be proven horribly wrong over the next three years if Michigan makes a good coaching hire and doesn't suffer massive attrition during this transition period.

See, Coach Rod was hired in December of '07 about 2 months before signing day. In that period of time, Rodriguez secured most of the current Carr recruits and brought in several of his own. He tried to get T. Pryor, for better or worse, and brought in several key offensive contributors out of his 8 commitments. This past season, 2 players that RR recruited completed their true junior years: Tay Odoms and Mike Shaw.

Roy Roundtree was the team's leading receiver the last two seasons after redshirting. Patrick Omameh is a future NFL draft pick playing at right guard. Terrence Robinson contributed in the slot. Ricky Barnum is poised to take over for Schilling at left guard next year. One of the other guys never made it to campus and Justin Feagin flamed out and is now a drug dealer or something. I think he might be enrolling at Michigan State.

The next year, RR had his first true recruiting class and it brought us Denard. Those guys just either completed their sophomore or redshirt freshmen seasons. There isn't a coach in the country that can win with second year players making up the bulk of the team. It's even tougher when you have to play more true freshmen than seniors.

Rich Rod is not without blame and the situation became so toxic that he had to go. But he can coach and he can recruit.

One last math problem:

If you took away all of Rosenberg's good articles and left only the bad ones, how many articles would you be left with?

The same amount you started with.