Henning The Magnificient

Carnac, move over

Tigers a smart bet to be quiet at deadline



Wait, what's this???

Tigers Trade Pudge to Yankees for Farnsworth

Fuck.

I was hoping for JEFF Farnsworth.

Splendid Lynn's Bio

Just stumbled upon this splendid little bio over at detroitnews.com:

Lynn Henning joined The Detroit News sports staff in 1979 after 3½ years as a sports writer and columnist for the Lansing State Journal. A lifelong Michigan native (St. Johns) and a 1974 journalism graduate from Michigan State, Henning has specialized through the years in covering baseball, as well as Michigan and Michigan State, Lions and Red Wings, and in writing about the outdoors. Henning spent seven years during the 1990s as editor of PGA Magazine and as a writer for the national weekly, Golfweek.

Lynn can be reached at lhenning@detnews.com.

Lynn Henning's favorites:
Favorite movie: Fargo
Favorite restaurant: Streetside Seafood, Birmingham
American hero: Thomas Jefferson
Favorite music: Jazz
Favorite shows and places away from sports and ESPN: Hardball with Chris Matthews; anything about World War II; HBO programs; History Channel; Sundance Channel.

No commentary, just for the record.

My favorite homophobic baseball pitcher

Yes, I love Todd Jones. I love him because it's fabulous when old-school baseball writers bring up his save percentage and attempt to pretend he's good at being a baseball pitcher. It's OK, they don't know any better. The save stat is useless, eclipsed in uselessness only by pitcher won/loss record.

I also LOVE it when he gives up bombs to Jermaine Dye.

Look, this Tigers team is poorly constructed. They have 1 good starting pitcher. Rogers blows, Robertson blows, Galarraga is a timebomb, and Miner doesn't count. The Tigers' bandwagon is full of douchebags that didn't even know Detroit had a baseball team until 2006. These fuckers stroke themselves off to Brandon Inge at night. Todd Jones upsets these people when he falters and I can't help but get a tingle up my leg (Chris Matthews™) when that happens.

Leyland has a new rule for Jones' use every month. First they had to watch his use on back to back days. Then they needed to use him ONLY in save situations. I guess the guy just can't get juiced up to throw his 89 mph cutter right down the middle unless he's protecting a lead. OK, fine.

Now, they just have to make sure they don't "overuse" him. Just encase this bigoted fuck in glass already and slap a "Use Only When Down By 10 Runs" sign on there. Or just encase him in glass and forget the sign.

Joneseycakes has 15 walks against 13 strikeouts in 2008. He's given up 46 hits in 39.2 innings. Every out he gets is a matter of luck.

This is not about the "closer" role. This is about a roster spot. Todd Jones is not a good use of one.

Lynn's Back At It

Mr. Henning has a long article today rehashing some of his favorite topics: Armando Galarraga's savior status, the Tiger's offseason failures, Edgar Renteria being anti-splendid, etc.

He also veers into "Baseball 101" territory with some talk of Tigers' scouts and their input into player acquisitions.

There is an interesting quote from Captain Blue Shirt, President Dombrowski, where he basically admits this core isn't going to win a World Series. "We may not win with these players, because we're getting older," he said, with a touch of resignation. He's right, but it's interesting to hear it from the guy that doubled down on these guys a few months ago.

Anyway, I'm not going to parse this thing line by line but the opening salvo was vintage Lynn and it's all downhill after that:

When the Tigers invested heavily, even dangerously, in three National League stars during the offseason, any anxiety was overwhelmed by a baseball team's bliss.


I had a hard time comprehending things after that. I've got a brain that I'm trying to keep from melting here people.

Anxiety & baseball team bliss.

Tilt.

First Post: The venerable Lynn Henning gets nice and crazy for us today!

Lynn has a 3-pronged crazy attack for us in today's Detroit News.  His latest opus focuses on Three names, events, etc., that top one person's list of Tigers talking points 10 weeks before the 2008 playoffs begin:

Hooray! Let's dig in:

1. Renteria's Troubles at shortstop

Uh oh, Lynn has been picking on Edgar lately, mainly concerned about his lack of any extra-base hits and lackluster range in the field.

It is, to me, an astonishing case of loyalty. Renteria has had an abysmal season that is stretching into its fourth month.
You wonder how many baseball people would be surprised if he were released. It's difficult to believe the Tigers would fare as badly if Ramon Santiago and a trade-deadline utility infielder replaced Renteria.
I understand past performances and the need to believe in players, but this in one personnel issue that's thoroughly baffling.

Wow, Lynn seems to be implying that the Tigers would should just outright release a guy they traded Jair Jurrjens and Gorkys Hernandez for just a few months back. And his plan to replace him? 1/2 of the Flying Infantiago brothers (career batting line of .239/.307/.320 in 913 at-bats) and a "trade-deadline utility infielder." Gosh, I hope Dombrowski is better at obtaining trade deadline utility guys than off-season starting shortstops.

Strange though, I remember Lynn telling me different things about Mr. Renteria in the past. For instance, from March 22, 2008:

Edgar Renteria, shortstop: He is not flashy. His days as an All-Star are probably in the past. But
he gets the job done at shortstop. He nails down the most important position on the field. The Tigers
paid a hefty price to land him, but no team is going anywhere without a quality shortstop. And
Renteria is all of that.


My big question is, if they release Renteria, aren't they forfeiting all of those clutch hits he will rack up with his clutchy goodness in the postseason?

2. Miner's big start

Lynn seems to think that Miner is going to propel the Tigers down the stretch.  Currently, Zach Miner has 28 walks and 24 K's this season.  But hey, that was mostly as a reliever, and he's a starter now!

He is back doing what he does best, starting, which was clear Monday night. He is more relaxed as a starter and is better able to let off the throttle on his fastball, which gets him into control trouble when he overthrows it.

Miner's career as a starter: 91 innings, 4.74 ERA
Miner's career as a reliever: 106.1, 3.47 ERA

Now, it's very possible that a 4.75 ERA as a starter has more value to the Tigers than a 3.47 ERA as a reliever, but I don't think Lynn was getting at that. Actually, I'm certain that has nothing to do with what Lynn is saying.

3. The making of an ace

Lynn is really excited that Justin Verlander might end up with 15 wins despite starting out 2-9. Of course, this is incredibly unimportant, but it launches Lynn into the following:

Prove that he could end up doing it all before he's finished: 300 victories, Hall of Fame -- you can't rule out anything when a pitcher has the superior talent Verlander owns.

Verlander is 25 years old. He currently owns 43 MLB wins. Lynn is talking about him getting to 300. Let's just assume he gets to 15 wins this year. That would give him 50 career victories. If he averaged 16 wins for the next 15 years, he'd have 290. He'd need 10 wins in his age-41 season to get to 300.

I'm taking the under.

Welcome to Splendid Lynn Henning

This blog will chronicle the adventures of Detroit sportswriters, and media personalities.  Folks such as Lynn Henning, Pope Jon Paul Morosi, Tom Gage, the whole MLive crew, Drew Sharp, Rob Parker, etc.  At least that's the idea.  The blog is named for Lynn Henning who badly overuses his thesaurus and famously (OK, not so famously) referred to Jacque Jones as a "splendid" hitter a few years back.  He really loves throwing splendid out there.  You'll see.